Wade looked outside through his kitchen window, watching the rainfall. It had started six days ago and was still going. This wasn’t normal rain either. It was thick, greasy, and smelled faintly of bacon. He finished his coffee and grabbed his coat and umbrella. Even with this strange rain, life must go on. Wade got in his truck and headed to work. Work was a small hog farm just outside of town. They took pride in having free-range, healthy pigs. Unfortunately, since the rain started, the pigs have been forced to stay inside. On the first day, they kept them outside, but the grease was too difficult to clean. Wade and his work partner, a young kid named Travis, did their best to keep the inside grease free.
Wade arrived at work and was horrified to see the pigs had gotten out.
“Travis! Why the hell are the pigs out of the barn?” Wade Yelled.
“I am so sorry! I was trying to feed them, and when I opened the door, they charged at me. I got spooked and jumped out of the way. As you can see, a few of them were able to get out before I was able to get my shit together.” Travis explained.
“Time to catch some pigs. Travis, stop chasing them! It’s not helping!” Wade said.
He goes inside and gets the emergency marshmallows. He rips the bag open and walks back outside. Starting a few feet from the door, he makes a trail of marshmallows leading to the barn.
“Will this work?” Travis asked.
“It normally does, but I’m not sure how well it will work when the marshmallows are covered in this greasy rain,” Wade replied.
They watched as, one by one, the pigs began to notice the marshmallows. It took a while, but eventually all the pigs were back inside.
“Well, Travis,” Wade said, “Are you ready to wash some pigs?”
Travis sighed and nodded. Washing the pigs was a lot of work. This grease or whatever was falling from the sky didn’t just rinse off the pigs. They spent a couple of hours scrubbing the pigs.
“Alright, you can head home if you want. I can finish up here.” Wade said
“Thanks, I will see you tomorrow,” Travis said
After Travis left, Wade continued working on the pigs. He made sure they were clean, fed, and secure inside the barn. There was so much he didn’t get to due to the pigs escaping, but there was nothing he could do about that now except hope tomorrow goes better.
The next morning, when he woke up, the first thing he noticed was how quiet it was outside. It sounded like the rain had stopped. He got up and went into the kitchen to make himself some coffee. Looking out the window, he was relieved to see that it, in fact, was not raining anymore. The ground looked gross, and his truck was still greasy, but at least he could start cleaning things up. Wade’s phone started ringing. He saw it was Travis and assumed the pigs got out again.
“Wade! You need to get here now! The pigs are falling; some are dead. I don’t know what to do. Please hurry!” Travis yelled.
“What do you mean the pigs are falling? Falling from what? Travis, what is going on?” Wade said, trying to stay calm.
“I have to go, just get here as soon as you can,” Travis said, then hung up the phone.
Wade gets in his truck and heads to the farm. When he gets there, it is an absolute disaster. The pigs have gotten out again, but instead of the pigs running around trying to evade Travis, they are flying. They didn’t have wings or anything, but they were up in the air flying. And falling. Wade watched in horror as the three pigs he was watching fly around suddenly fell to the ground. It was at least a 15 foot fall, maybe more. They hit the ground with a thud and lie on the ground, unmoving. At this rate, Wade wasn’t going to have any pigs left. Wade began to look around for Travis. He walked around the farm, stepping over dead pigs and dodging ones that were falling. He watched two pigs that had fallen only a couple of feet get up and start walking around again. Confident the pigs would stay on the ground, he headed into the barn. He heard pigs squeal behind him, and when he turned around, the pigs were once again in the air, this time even higher. Wade watched both pigs fall and softly bounce as they hit the dirt. Knowing there was nothing he could do for them, he stepped into the barn.
Travis was sitting against the wall, staring at the pigs with tears streaming down his face. Wade sat next to him.
“Hey, are you okay?” Wade asked.
“They just keep falling, Wade. Why do they keep falling? There are so many dead pigs.” Travis said through tears. “I tried to save them. I did. Do you know how hard it is to try to catch a pig that is falling from 20 feet in the air?”
“The pigs!” Wade yelled, pointing at the pigs that were hovering a couple of feet in the air.
“PIGS NO!” Travis yelled, getting up and running to the pigs.
They watched as the pigs dropped back to the ground.
“Why is this happening? Do you know if it’s happening to other animals?” Wade asked.
“I am unsure,” Travis said while petting a pig.
“You stay here and keep an eye on these ones. I’m going to go inside and see if there is anything on the news.” Wade said.
Wade walks to the main building, turning on the TV once inside. He flips to the news and sees the reporter standing before a local petting zoo.
“Hello, this is Marcus Monroe, and I am bringing you breaking news from Fluffy Fields Petting Zoo and Animal Rehabilitation Center. Inside this petting zoo are pigs. Flying pigs.” He starts walking toward the zoo entrance. He walks inside and gestures to the pigs flying around, who immediately fall to the ground. “The pigs are no longer flying. In fact, I’m not even sure the pigs are still alive. What is going on with the pig population? Is this happening everywhere or just here? Why are the other animals not affected by this? How many pigs have to die before we have answers?”
Wade turned off the TV when Marcus started sounding hysterical. He went back outside to find Travis, who was chasing the few remaining pigs on the ground.
“What have I told you about chasing the pigs?” Wade said.
“I know, but if I can catch the pigs, then we can tie them up and prevent them from falling to their death,” Travis responded.
Wade sighed and helped him round up the rest of the pigs. Once the pigs were restrained, they could still fly, but not very high. The two men walked around the farm looking at all the dead pigs. A lot of them weren’t even big enough to slaughter yet. Ultimately, they decided to dispose of the pig bodies anyway since they were still unsure what was wrong with them. Once they were done, they went home for the night.
When Wade got home, he made himself some instant noodles. He didn’t have the energy to cook himself a real meal after the day he had. The microwave beeped, and he retrieved his noodles and sat down in front of the TV. Turning on the TV, he sees Marcus Monroe, this time in the studio.
“The pig experts are saying to tie up your pigs. It doesn’t stop them from flying, but it prevents them from falling from a height that will kill them. The world’s leading animal scientists are investigating what caused this, with current theories pointing to the rain. They also haven’t been able to figure out why the pigs keep falling once they’re in the air. Stay tuned for more updates. “
It cuts to a commercial, and Wade turns off the TV. Satisfied that he and Travis apparently did the right thing, he went to bed.
The next morning, he got up, made himself some coffee, and got some bacon out of the fridge. He stared at the bacon for a while and finally decided that, with everything going on, he can’t eat it. Turning on the TV, he sits down in his chair, waiting to see what Marcus Monroe has to say about the pig situation.
“We have reports that the pig population has dropped a whopping 70 percent since the pigs started flying. The price of pork has increased 50% overnight. Scientists are now working to figure out how to stop the pigs from flying. Again, it has been recommended that you tie up your pigs. I will be here reporting any new developments on the pig situation, so stay tuned.” Monroe finishes, and it cuts to the weather.
Wade got in his truck and headed to the farm. When he arrived, Travis ran over before he even had a chance to get out of his truck.
“I figured it out! I got here early and was finally able to figure it out! The pigs can’t fly if you look at them!” Travis said.
“What are you talking about? They can’t fly if you look at them? That sounds absolutely ridiculous.” Wade said.
“Let me show you,” Travis said, grabbing Wade by the arm and dragging him inside the barn.
Wade saw the pigs still tied up and safe on the ground.
“Turn around,” Travis demanded.
Wade turned his back to the pigs, and they waited a few minutes. When the pigs started squealing, Travis grabbed his arm and spun him around. He watched the pigs fall back to the ground.
“Well, shit,” Wade said with wide eyes. “How did you figure this out?”
“This morning, while feeding the pigs, I realized I haven’t seen any of the pigs actually take off from the ground. I’ve only ever seen them in the air, but even then, they fall almost immediately.” Travis explained.
“We have to let everyone know! We can save the pigs!” Wade said.
“It’s too late to save the pigs. You know that. The population has declined far too much.” Travis said.
Wade starts to argue with him, but is interrupted by a loud siren from town.
“Was that the tornado siren? I don’t see any sign of tornadoes.” Travis said.
“I’m not sure. Get in my truck, let’s go see what’s going on. It could be related to the pigs.” Wade said.
They got in the truck, and Wade drove them into town. When they got closer, they saw a large dark shape in the sky that resembled an umbrella. There were red and blue lights flashing around the rim of the umbrella. He stopped the truck just outside of town. Wade didn’t feel comfortable getting closer to the object. It wasn’t moving, but it was making a low-pitched buzzing noise that was progressively getting louder. Eventually, it got so bad that they had to cover their ears. Travis was saying something, but Wade couldn’t hear him over the buzzing. People were starting to come out of buildings, looking up at the object above them. Suddenly, there was a bright blue flash. Wade was temporarily unable to see anything other than spots floating in his vision. When his vision cleared, he looked toward town. Everything was gone. There was nothing but a large scorched area of earth under the object in the sky. The object started spinning, slowly at first and then faster. They watched in silence as it shot up into the sky, disappearing from view.
“Wade,” Travis whispered.
“I don’t know,” Wade responded.
They drove back to the farm in silence.
When they arrived back at the farm, Wade went inside and turned on the news. He was expecting Marcus Monroe, but instead, it was a woman who normally covers celebrity gossip.
“Hello, this is Lauren Rowe reporting to you in place of Marcus, who was unfortunately in town when the bomb hit. For those just tuning in, it appears as though a bomb went off in the center of town, completely destroying everything. There have been reports of this happening in cities all over the world. The bombs are leaving nothing behind but devastation. It seems as though the bombs are coming from large, umbrella-shaped aircraft in the sky. We have been advised to st-”
Lauren vanished from the screen, replaced by a man. More accurately, someone who seemed to be disguised as a man. It looked human, but there was something slightly off about his face. Almost like he was wearing an ill-fitting mask. The fake man began to speak in a voice felt more than heard.
“Humans. My name is Vrodiilyxx. I have come from the Andromeda Galaxy to take back what is rightfully mine. 300,000 years ago, we came here and released our newest creation, Humans. We created you as what we hoped was an intelligent species in our likeness. Unfortunately, you have shown us over the years that you are only capable of hate and destruction. We worked so hard finding a suitable planet for you, and what did you do? Destroy the ecosystem. Harm each other and the creatures of the planet. One thing you did do that was detrimental to us was domesticate pigs. Our kind can not survive around pigs. We have found over various visits over the years that any contact with pigs immediately kills our kind. The rain you experienced was created by us to kill the pigs. Unfortunately, it did not have the intended result. Even though we were unsuccessful at wiping out the pig population, we did still manage to take out a good chunk of it. Enough that we felt safe coming in and taking back this beautiful planet. Once we eliminate the Human race, we will take over the earth and make sure it thrives. Please don’t worry too much, your death will be painless, I can promise you that. Enjoy your last day alive.”
Vrodiilyxx disappears, and Lauren is back on the screen.
“Um, so, I’m sorry. I have to go.” Lauren said while walking off camera.
“You should go home, Travis, and be with your family,” Wade said.
“My family was in that blast. There is no one to go home to.” Travis said sadly.
“Well, I guess it’s just you, me, and these last few pigs. We should let them fly.” Wade said.
To maintain a sense of normalcy, they tended to the farm as if it were any other day. The two men worked in silence, noticing the instant the buzzing started. It was directly above them, accompanied by the same lights and umbrella-shaped object they now knew was an aircraft.
“Travis, untie the pigs and close your eyes,” Wade commanded.
Travis didn’t respond but started to untie the pigs. Once all the pigs were no longer tied up, they both closed their eyes. They heard pigs squealing above them as the buzzing from the ship got louder. A loud zapping sound sounded in the sky. Both men opened their eyes and looked up while pig guts rained down upon them. They looked at eachother and shook hands.
“It was good working with you,” Wade said
“You as well, Wade, thanks for everything,” Travis responded.
The last thing they saw was a bright light
Other than a brief struggle in China due to the sheer amount of pigs, it took only a day before the human race was completely eradicated. Vrodiilyxx found an island teeming with lush forests and decided it was where he would set up a base. He commanded the other ships to all find suitable locations to form villages. Start families. Nurture this planet until its thriving once again. Then they can move on to their next experiment.